Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
MIDGETS
????
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
