Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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