Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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