dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
