I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I seem to have left my pride at pride
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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