I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Mom said you looked used
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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