we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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