I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Randomize
