that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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