Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
