Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
