I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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