I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
