i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
