He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
