You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
