He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
