weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
You may now shotgun with the bride
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
