these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
