I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize