thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
