I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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