its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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