I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
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