All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
