yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
