she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Be still, my beating vagina.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
