My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Enjoy the penises
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
