How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
