shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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