Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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