You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I will be naked everywhere
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
