sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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