You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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