Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
