I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
