Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
