Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
where are you?
Hypothermia
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
