that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
