I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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