similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize