i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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