I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
nutella sex= disaster
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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