I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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