he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
