are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
