I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
