My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Randomize
