I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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