Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
